Why I Write ...

Purely as a form of expression to the emotions that run riot in my life at different junctures. This blog has seen several title revisions that also reflect the state of being and evolution I am constantly in. If one were to remain stagnant in hope of never changing their temporal present, one will awaken someday to much regret. Life is about living, evolving and adapting to the constant changes all around us.

My spot on the web is essentially a journey along with my monologue ramblings of my coherent mind accompanied by the incoherent thing called life. Read me if you like ... if you don't it is not the end of the world. I am at the very least a believer in humility lifts us further than pride.

Happy trails

30 July 2009

Things That Make Me Sleepless ... July 30, 2009

Ok if you been following the Teoh Beng Hock case, something you read in the papers today is going to make you suddenly suspicious where this is all leading to ... but please to read this and tell me what you think.

The findings of another unknown male's DNA on his blazer and belt - alarm bells alarm bells ... at least I am glad they did not find it in his nether regions or undergarments because all of a sudden this problem free guy might find himself in death being framed by the DNA finding - I wonder if our so sharp investigators are going to be able to identify who this unknown male is - but again I remain skeptical, afterall in this country anything boleh become fact even if everyone else knows it's a mythical creation of evidence. So we now have to wait with bated breathe for the scene to unfold. But why are the alarm bells ringing so loudly in my head??? I am sure if you had half a brain you'd know why too.

This next piece of news makes me want to demand till my last breath all this bloody gangster glorifying shit ass movies especially from Tamil genre be banned banned banned. Didn't anyone realise something was amiss??? Now one more dead lawyer (not that I particularly like lawyers ok seeing how most of them are blood sucking leeches - but that's another story for another day) and if you look at the sequence of things, I'd say I'd have raised a concern that my life was in danger. Cheh wah cheh wah ... go up to a temple force someone to consume something that killed him with renal failure. Dei this not Tamil movie la enough of this nonsense!!! (**pliss to use your best Tamil movie English accent wokai**)

THIS has to take the cake la ... first kris waving, now order police to take action against people voicing out what they feel is a totally inhumane law. Only in Malaysia oh wait are we going the way of 'democratic' Iran??? Mr. Minister aren't people in a democracy allowed to voice out their thoughts? or is the Malaysian Democracy one that keeps only certain people safe and happy. Now I am really getting to insomniac state - what with all these worries on how this country is governed and where we are heading to. **sigh** Obviously the boys in blue are merely the puppets - when told they do. Theirs is not to question why.

Some of you might have read my Facebook updates yesterday about my morning trauma on the way to work yesterday. I almost had the unfortunate luck of running over a man who was knocked down by someone else on the ELITE highway. Now the interesting thing was that 5 minutes before I came upon this scary moment of my driving life, my usual 'nemesis' on the road a certain Satria Neo - this female has got to be one of those drivers that really just want to step up to and slap some sense into her thick head - driving at 160km/hr and eyes on your mobile texting is just not happening la!!!

And yesterday morning I was driving a different car so she might not have realised it was me without Charles whose butt she has to 'cucuk' aka tailgate like a maniac. As she passed me by and I noted her usual style of eyes NOT on the road I thought 'You are so going to pay one of these days' ... now as fate would play it - in 5 mins there she was ahead of me obviously part of the accident that I almost came to be a part of had I not been able to avoid running over the man laying on the road.

Thankfully God's hand was with me at that very moment and I sailed past the car on my right, the debris on the road and the man to my left barely missing him, before I noticed her and all I could do was be fucking mad at her because she so deserved it. I noted her bumper was pretty damaged. I called emergency assistance immediately. I dunno what she did next, personally I don't care. I had a pregnant passenger on board and that was my main concern not killing the man and not killing my passenger.

I called up later to check and was told that it was not a fatal accident - PHEW means the man was alive when I passed him - which then means had I lost my cool and panicked I would have been the one that killed him - and I would not have been the one who had caused him to be laying there on the road. It was one of the scariest moments of my 7 years of driving. Probably not my last, seeing as Malaysians love to dice with death, and I have to be extra extra extra vigilant to ensure me and my passengers never end up in an accident.

Did not see her this morning - for obvious reasons, but then this morning there was another female in a MyVi and I thought girl you better be careful. And then I asked God to keep us all safe because lately, I have realised people who have hurt me unforgivably by their actions and I have been angry enough to curse them have had tragedy befall them .... all within a spate of 8 weeks ... it didn't occur to me at the time. But when I was thinking about it and I was relating the incidents randomly to friends, they all said .ani you're not one to cross now, it seems your thoughts are powerful.

Hahahahahahah I had to laugh. Because had my thoughts really been so effective in getting the desired results I can see one issue having been resolved a long time ago. But then again, I know every time I have come close to cursing this person, I have stopped myself because at the end of the day, this person's life is entwined in some form to mine. Damn my conscience!!!

Having said that though, if I have dreamt of someone 3x in a row, I have to warn you - usually something really bad happens to them or worse they die. If you hurt me so much I cannot ever forgive you and you cease to exist in my life, trust me, you will feel the pain you caused me in some form or manner. Perhaps then sometimes I have to consciously remind myself that people are the way they are for reasons only known to themselves and I should not obliterate them from my mind, because then well they seem to have some misfortune befall them. This makes me sleepless because I have to question why this has happened, and what forces are in play and where will this lead me to.

The mind is a very powerful both friend and foe. I am learning to use my thoughts for my own self growth without detriment to others. Now that I have acknowledged that sometimes my mind sees far ahead whilst I choose to ignore it's warnings and signs of what is to come.

Now if only I could use my mind to control certain elements to all align themselves into my favour - be great dontcha think??? But alas for now, I can only smell danger before I see, which has me put myself into anti-crash mode gear ... and navigate and come out unscathed as possible. Perhaps a little more practice and I might start to realign my misaligned stars **eheheheheh**

Off I go .... catch ya dolls later - and perhaps I am just delusional haahahha perhaps ......

29 July 2009

Sarah Palin Farewell Speech by William Shatner

Anyways if you can't see the video here's the link: Palin Farewell

I guess this one needs no commentary although I must say I am bemused that this was a candidate for the Republican Vice Presidency ... she seemed alright at the start and then all the way downhill from there - but good show girl, all the best in whatever you next you do.

I thought 'Capt. Kirk' did an interesting angle on Palin's speech ... what do you say?

28 July 2009

RIP Yasmin Ahmad ... July 28, 2009

By now if you're Malaysian you would know the amazing spirit behind those wonderful displays of the Malaysia most of us desire in the Petronas adverts we've grown so used to has untimely passed away.

I for one admit that I've not watched a single one of her movies - probably because I just haven't really had the time nor have I really watch Malay movies from the 80s onwards - seems to me Malay movies lost their appeal.

However I did read the reviews of some of Yasmin's works and kept thinking I want to watch them uncensored by the morality clowns we have in this country where everything is a defamation to Islam even if they have no clue what they are blindly chopping out just to keep certain quarters feeling more holier than thou.

I was reading about Yasmin and stumbled upon her blog(s) and I think it is worth sharing although she will write again for us to read and follow and applaud, she has left a mark in all our hearts even if we never knew her personally, we knew her work. She made her 90second commercials work at making us reflect, think and also jab us into acknowledging what is missing in the Malaysia we live in today.

Perhaps you might find her writings interesting - I know I have ... on The Storyteller and The Storyteller Part 2.

Yasmin, I hope you continue to inspire Malaysians to erase what makes them different but embrace what makes us one, we've a long journey for that. Too many hurts to heal, too much water under the bridge and politicians who are better off keeping us all separated and suspicious of each other.

You made a difference when irregardless of who we were, your 'small films' made us respond and moved us. May you rest in peace Yasmin Ahmad. And may Malaysians find ourselves someday - then truly the work you began would have come a full circle.

Catch The Telur Rangers ... July 28, 2009

Hey there all. If you have missed the news about these 3 spunky girls on a mission catch up with their adventure on their blog The Telur Rangers.

It's all about saving turtles .. by saying NO TO TURTLE EGGS ... give our shelled flippered friends a shot at overcoming extinction.

There's an itinerary about where these girls are going to be at as they traverse Malaysia collecting your signatures as you pledge to leave them turtle eggs alone and let them hatch and face mother nature not end up in your gut and passed on to Indah Water to waste manage.

If you remember watching Finding Nemo - remember the turtle dude was a 150 years old ... let's at least contribute to seeing them 150 hours old then ... before their great journey fraught with challenges of the sea.

Say no to turtle eggs please. Say no also to all the other ridiculous aphrodisiac type reasons we give for killing animals mindlessly - just remember if your sex life is down - nothing is going to help you but your own self - leave the musk deer with it's balls so he too can frolic and make more babies, the rhino his horn, the tiger his gall - trust me you won't get braver just be a part of the mindless murders of such beautiful creations.

Save our world, make changes to how you view the creation. Nothing is less important, all are equals!

Sporadic Musings ... July 24, 2009

It has been one of those weeks where I’ve had my drive to and from alone because I am at my client’s place. Such instances of solitude often give me the time to reflect. Anybody who knows me knows I think too much.

I have a tendency of taking little bits of conversations and actions and mulling over it. Rolling it over my mind. The exchanges, the body language and the immediate outcome as well as the after effects of such instances in my life.

And in the recent few weeks I have come to observe another interesting trait about people. And come to also realise that the inherent nature of people will eventually be exposed no matter how matter self help and improvement books they read or courses they attend in the hope of acquiring some new more public persona.
This is because inherent nature is in your genes. You’ve worked very hard all your life to try and quell these displays because you want people to perceive you in a certain way. I’ve through my many interactions through the years and in my ever learning and absorbing state, have seen all kinds. Been often too at the receiving end of these people because as silly as it sounds, I have a pretty gullible soul – yes yes I admit it. I am gullible in believing that inside each of us there is a goodness we just need to look hard enough to find it in the next person.

Time and again, I’ve been greatly disappointed, when someone I have given access to my life and me as a person has proved to be a bad move. I carry a heart that has been broken so many times that there are times now I think I might not survive another disappointment but then again I am built to be a survivor. No matter what happens, I try to see a lesson in it and learn from and avoid such repeats in the next encounter.

Let me give you an example. If I was to have something, information that might assist someone, the only working phone or pc, the only one with a car to move people with, I wouldn’t hesitate to say come let me help you out here. I do it without considering that I might have to drive 40km out of my way just to help this person out. I just do it, because I feel if I am in a capacity to help.

But I note that for some the potential of someone asking them for a favour or assistance is preempted by a ready excuse of prior commitments. Or if they are forced into having to offer say a ride to someplace, they will first make known how bad the traffic is where you're heading. Some people are rather thick-skinned though such hints they ignore. I on the other hand if I get a vibe like that immediately will refuse the 'offer' because I hate feeling indebted especially when it's not entirely sincere.

Small things really give you insight into people. Being far from perfect myself, I realised the other day that many of the people I come in contact with on a daily basis are amazing actors. They have learned their lines and expressions and interaction skills from self help books and mind over matter type gurus. They do pretty damn well in life - which is GREAT, I don't deny. Others find themselves saying or referring to so-and-so who is just soooooooooooo perfect in everything. Even I am sometimes taken in by these amazing displays.

And then you sit down one day and have a leisurely chat or in a given situation watch these persons a little more closely. Their expressions, their automatic reactions, their thoughts and then you see the true self behind the facade and you are dumbstruck. I know I am usually dumb-struck.

Humans are an amazing creation. And in that amazing creation we have what I would call the inherent nature of a person. Which is like the genes that make you up, the blood that flows in your veins. That is probably why I try really hard to no longer buy into the image people sell to me of themselves. I try to take them as they come and expect nothing to be what it seems.

Some of you might think this is a rather negative way to live life. But if you have lived my life in my shoes and experienced the number of 'fools gold' type souls I have encountered you might begin to understand my approach.

Knowing that I myself am less than perfect or good, I can accept now these little white lies people perpetuate of themselves in this thing we call living because we all always do what we must to survive. If you try to be the real you, people may hate you, people may use you ... depends on which end of the reality scale you fall in.

At the moment, I am learning to just be me as I am. I take precautions to avoid being used and hurt, I avoid expecting anything from the 'good souls', I avoid disliking the 'less than human souls' because I suppose everyone has a story behind who they are today.

But if you are inherently good or inherently have the tendency to hurt or be selfish - eventually life has a way of displaying your true self when you least expect it. And I recently have had the interesting experience of seeing someone in 'naked truth' ... none of their practiced perfection could save them when their inherent nature reared it's head.

I had to come away laughing ... and I thought to myself thankfully I can live with my flaws, I wonder if this person can live with theirs to put so much effort into personality projection.

Anyhows I hope you're having a good week, I am off now to look into other jumbled thoughts and sporadic musings.

Be well all, we live in dangerous times!

20 July 2009

Music From A Tree ... hmmmm July 20, 2009

I was stumbling :)) and guess what I found ... this piece :) am sure you will find it as interesting as I did ...

Diego Stocco - Music From A Tree from Diego Stocco on Vimeo.

If you can't see the video then here's the link - pretty creative and a lot of effort me thinks but damn sure entertaining :)) - Music From A Tree. And from what I saw, this chap Diego Stocco is damn creative ... but I won't let on too much ... why don't you check out his other stuff :)

Tell me what you think.

17 July 2009

Malaysia Continues To Scare Me ... July 17, 2009

Dali a friend of mine, pointed out the other scary news which greeted me this morning when I wrote the earlier posting.

The second piece of news was that over some rivalry a man beheaded the 5 year old son of his enemy and left the head in a bucket for the parents to find and then ran off with his wife and daughter - WTF is happening in this country. Little boy beheaded in family feud.

What in heavens name did that child do to deserve to die. When do human beings cease to be humans and become worse than animals.

What's even scarier is the fact that our DPM in a most recent update in TheStar Online says this .. and I must say the headline caption makes you want to spite blood ... Cops to probe MACC over Teoh's dead if needed: DPM. Errr Mr. DPM, what do you mean if needed. Don't you think that would be the obvious call of duty??? ... but this is Malaysia - I guess not.

From how justice works in this country - I can also imagine that the person last with Teoh (if we ever find him) will in all eventuality be also a paper-bagged face we will never recognise in the light of day *am sure you follow me here*

Some time back we had students suddenly falling out of hostels and found dead, then we had a uni drop out renting at the uni hostel ( errr how is this possible) found to have bled to death after delivering baby who also died incidentally. Where was the father or rather who is the father - remain a mystery we won't know answers to I am sure.

National Service was introduced to eradicate racial and social barriers and create partriotic youths - the future of this nation. We all also know how that has been going. Unexplained deaths, rape by facilitators, bullying and fights, food poisoning. Makes me scared to think either of my daughters might be actually called up for service. In 3 short months, I could be bringing home a traumatised child or worse a corpse it seems from all the things you read in the news.

Attending a talk on City Safety for Women and listening to the resource persons true life statistics on abductions, rapes and murders in this country - being a woman is tragedy you are cursed with from the day you were born because nothing escapes this perverts. They are your fathers your grandfathers your uncles your brothers your step-fathers, your mother's boyfriends, your army and police man, your ex/male colleague whom you snubbed, your ex/boyfriend or spouse who hasn't gotten over the fact you don't want to be with them anymore - actually wait it's any man you know out there is a potential danger to you the woman, girl or female baby.

The modes operandi of these psychopaths is even more chilling when you think about it. And we are all at risk.

We live in a perceived and choking morality where unwanted pregnancies are a cause for great trauma. No one helps but everyone condemns. So what do we end up with??? Scared unwed mothers drowning their newborns in toilets, old buckets, left to die in dustbins the list goes on.

Take for instance a couple I know. He a result of mixed marriage is Muslim by the fact his mother is Malay. She is a girl from abroad, non-Muslim. Love transcends all obstacles. They planned to marry. But whilst in the process of conversion, forms to be filled, bureaucracy found out she was expecting their child.

Child is born - because father is Muslim, mother is now a convert, their 'nikah' certificate date is short of the number of months by which this child would be legitimate - this child is now ILLEGITIMATE despite his parents now being married and wanting to provide responsibly towards the child with opportunities. But our perceived morality and religious bigots choose to stigmatize this child with the label illegitimate - the birth cert carries only his mother's name and the father's details are blank!

Is there a sense in all of this? Does religion one is born into get the better of being human and kind and caring towards the future of this child?

It makes you wonder why so many children are running around without their birth certificates - who'd want one when one can't put their father's name on it.

Such things makes my blood boil. The victims usually continue to be victimised and the perpetrators continue to do what they do best ... which is scare the living daylights of anyone with half a brain and some sense of humanity in them.

And in Malaysia, somehow everything is forgotten the moment so flippant type gossip appears in the media ... the stark realities go on status quo business as usual.

Where are we heading to ... crikey! I just had a cold shiver run down my back!!

Can we taking a cue from the late King of Pop ... "Heal the world, make it a better place, for you and for me and the entire human race, there are people dying and if you care enough for the living, make a better place for you and for me"

Malaysia Scares Me ... July 17, 2009

And why wouldn't Malaysia scare me .... have you read the news lately?? I completely missed the latest until late last night looking at FB updates about someone dying in MACC custody. So on my mobile I went information surfing last night while preping for a night's sleep.

And then I went WTF!!!! Yikes!!!

Doesn't the MACC investigate corruption cases although really they ONLY ever investigate alleged Opposition leaders misuse of public funds. The fact that BN's blatant corrupted conniving criminals with feigned innocense and incensing insolence when questioned is NEVER investigated is a separate matter - but this is afterall the so called 1Malaysia Najib keeps talking about - the only 1 I see here is that BN especially UMNO will never be called up to justice. There rest of Malaysia to hell with us. We're merely a means to their over the top ends.

And we can already see the 'cover up' in progress. Teoh Beng Hock's death is now classified as sudden death - hell ya it's sudden! The boy was going to get registered today. As the rest are arguable asking - how in heavens name did someone in custody for interrogation get to the rooftop and then jump off an adjacent building to his untimely unexplained death.

But Nazri as usual in his foot in mouth manner comes out and kills all speculation of how this death happened and says it was suicide. Dude!!! What did MACC do to this boy he committed suicide???? Did you buggers 'sodomise' him and threaten 'exposure'???

And let me guess somehow miraculously the government certainly most credible autopsy report is going to find either **clears throat here* ... you guessed it either "fluid in the lungs" or lo and behold the newest autopsy finding in Malaysia's government pathologists "bacterial infection in the inner most layer of the tiniest part of the small intestine" ... man what I am doing slaving in IT ... I could do this type of reports with my eyes closed and be the toast of the Malaysian version of justice served!

Oh wait now ... perhaps the late Teoh needed to get up to that part of the building so that gravity might have somehow made the fluid in his lungs expel, or perhaps the bacterial infection reacts to itself at higher altitude ... I mean really ... the boys in blue have long entertained us with their mind boggling autopsy reports and how everything is a sudden death.

Now the so called revamped BPR/ACA who seem to be nothing but the new version isn't any more transparent then the MACC makeup Rosmah uses to cake in her face daily .... (yes yes I know my dislike for the woman is obvious). MACC has definitely lost any minute credibility it had (if you believed they had any to begin with!). A suicide while it's custody - good grief!!!

Are the Malaysian people, the you and me soooooooooo gullible to the bedtime stories Najib and his goons are throwing at us? I mean they took us on a merry mystery ride on the Mongolian C4 and we all 'know' how justice is being served in that circumstance.

Whilst it may be wrong to speculate how Teoh might have met his untimely death. But come on can it be helped????? Everyone wants to know what will be the earth-shattering finding this time. And I am sure bookies are taking in the bets now - and I am sure it won't be something that you and me didn't already think would be the finding.

My sincere condolences to the family and fiance of Teoh Beng Hock, and may justice be served when it matters.

Otherwise Malaysia truly scares the living daylights outta me. It would seem to me you have to make your choices carefully, if you want to survive in Malaysia ... otherwise make sure there's no fluid in your lungs or happy bacteria in your gut!!

10 July 2009

Flip Flop Here We Go Again ... Jul 10, 2009

I almost find the government of MALAYsia and their nefarious sense of flip flopping on policies and especially so when it comes to Education policies sickening.

If you haven't heard the news then please come out from under your shell. We are yet again changing midstream the course of the dissemination of knowledge of Science and Math in English to Malay. The fact that my generation of school goers did learn our Bio, Chem and Physics and Math electives in Malay does not mean we excelled in it we just reverted to textbooks and reading material in ENGLISH to graps the fundamentals. Having said that I used English books for History and Geography too ahahah made it so much more interesting than grappling with the 'malay-nised' English terms which sounded out of this world ... like the first time I learnt tetikus was the Malay word for the mouse we use with our PCs eheheheh it was like errrrr ok ...

Anwar Ibrahim once Education Minister, now deposed DPM ... Opposition PM wannabe introduced words we never heard before, our teachers equally had no idea what they were either and this was in MALAY ...

Dr. M who mooted the idea is not impressed. Pak Lah who is likely one of the most forgetable of PMs says Way to go (secretly me thinks he don't understand English la that's why) ... Parents are screaming keep the English, lazy teachers are now rejoicing, more kursus to attend no need to teach classes ahahaha who gets burnt in the end? Our Children ... in the global challenges, our kids are regressing instead of progressing.

It seems that every Education Minister tries very hard to introduce really strange ideas into mainstream mass education policies in hope of I have come to believe creating a generation of non-thinkers they bank on will someday vote them into power.

So here we go again. In time for the Manik Urai by-election, government comes up with revert Maths and Science to Malay, and emphasise on the strengthening of English. Hmmmm right. results showed even rural school children were scoring better. The problem lay in the Malay educated lot of teachers who can't string a decent English sentence together who were struggling to cope with the knowledge transfer. The kids however have the Internet and other sources of information which was coming to them in English to perform better.

The government gleefully says they will be saving 40million per annum in special allowances for these teachers who have been sent to upskill them in English to teach these subjects. And in the same breath they say they have to spend 5 billion to retrain all these teachers to now teach the subject in Malay.

Errrrrrrr is it just me or does anyone realise the number of zeros behind both figures quoted? And how much do you think has already been spent on giving the Math and Science teachers English skills?

Aiya ... in the end ... out one pocket into someone else la ... pusing pusing someone gets the last laugh. Scores of children get lost in the education system because we will ALWAYS have half-baked ill prepared teachers. If teachers themselves cannot challenge themselves to overcome their phobia of teaching in English, and now we will have those saying they can't teach in Malay.

I wonder how then will students in our flip flopping education policies ever be prepared to take on the world when they cannot seem to have confidence instilled in them from their educators. Perhaps we will always be lagging behind. The ones with the finances will send their kids elsewhere to study and be challenged and empowered to keep open minds in the pursuit of learning.

There is only one conclusion I can come to, the education system in Malaysia teaches us to find excuses why we cannot go forward not educate us to be bold and go forward with a sense of adventure of the whole learning process.

So then I also suppose, parents will have to now find ways (am sure there are already even more tuition opportunities opening up) to keep their struggling children abreast with the flip floppers decisions.

Truly another Malaysia Boleh apa apa bila bila masa (Malaysia Can Anyhow Anytime) decision that leaves a very bitter taste in the mouth of millions of parents as they try to see what the future holds for their children.

Weekend joy no less in Malaysia ...

4 July 2009

The Weeks Passed ... July 04, 2009

Hi there again (if anyone is a regular here) ... It's been a while since I wrote anything here - been busy and internet-less where I have been or else I'd have tapped away and 10mins later posted whatever that's taken my fancy for the day .

Let's see now ... quite a bit has happened.

Maids Getting A Day Off: Now as usual the government in their typical knee-jerk reaction to bad publicity comes up with some big time 'solutions' to the problem and in result giving opportunity for more problems to emerge. I suppose they have a plan to compensate all employers who have their houses robbed, or maids who get pregnant on their days off and also for the one where the maid disappears outta blue ... whatever it is the Government has to do something to combat the extremely poor publicity it's getting in the Republic of Indonesia ... especially with the allegations of brutish royalty on one of their beauties. Another senseless drama we have on-going. I mean most people who have maids have more stress than those without maids - and most are at the hostage scenario of their maids. The few nasty monsters now have created more headaches for the rest of us who are already burdened with maids who know since both employers have to work, without them, these employers are then stuck unable to find full time minders for their sick parents or young children. SIGH! my maid is on perpetual holiday it's not funny that I have to pay her to grow fat and lazy. But that's the price I have to pay for having aging parents one who is semi mobile only and two young kids. And being a single parent, I can't even stop working to look after them - so I remain a hostage to these government big ideas and the maid with the upper hand .. and you wonder why I am hypertensive.

.ani Goes To The Doctor ... Finally: It had to be done in the end. These morning waking up feeling like a 10 tonne lorry was on my head and driving with that splitting headache. The unbearable exhaustion and feeling ill out of the blue. The blood pressure readings started going wacko once I started taking random readings. The scary part here was that the diastolic readings were just really not reassuring.

Then as luck would have it, suddenly work got more intense. And I had to drive into KL in the mornings and that is as you can imagine one of the worst possible things to do work days ... after the Sg. Besi toll it's a nightmare all the way to the center of town. So Friday I went to see the doctor. Had a long lecture on weight management ( I knew that already was a problem! ) ... got some medication to start trying to control my blood pressure. Done with the blood tests waiting for the results.

My conclusion is that with the years of pushing myself to the brink to survive all that life has thrown at me, I've really neglected my own health - always just trying to keep borderline healthy - I think last year was quite an eye opener to my many health shortcomings. And then with the work place shitty turn of events it's all come to pass ... like an avalanche it's piling up on me. And I had to face up to the fact that well life's too short and I have to be around a long time more for the girls. So medication and weight watching - that's a way to start I guess.

The Passing of MJ and FF: Now this was a total shock. I mean icons from my childhood ... gone in a blink. In Farah Fawcett's instance I think you were more prepared but Michael Jackson's was like OHMIGOD!!!! I mean the fellow has been having such a bad time this July was going to be his one last shot at capturing the past glories but well I guess sometimes life comes and takes you away just when you think you can get to where you want to be ... (another reason why I've decided to get my life in order).

Lee Kuan Yew Meets 'Rose': The first time a Malaysian PM's wife get a separate visit ... and we have to see her face every single day in the papers it makes me puke. And now BN new meaning is Bini Najib .. ahahah do we even have to ask why??? Me thinks the PM is really the first lady and the self proclaimed first lady is REALLY the PM ... what do you think?? And as for that 1 Malaysia hype - the only thing that brings all Malaysians together is our united disgust and hatred for that female called Rose ... damn why didn't the Titanic take her down as well.

Michael Owen is ManUnited's New Boy: Am quite sure that this free transfer is going to have the Kopite's whinging blue black again and vomitting bile on Fergie. Although I think let the boy have his chance at playing footie. Am looking forward to see how he does with this side of the Red then ... and I think he's cuter than that metrosexual diva we just sold to Real Madrid. Not that my footie depends solely on the cute factor of the players eheheheh but I no doubts can hear the Kop fans starting up their whiny rhetoric soon enough. Am looking forward to a good kick off come EPL season when ManU host Birmingham ... July 19th.

Am off to move my car now. Ashna wants to cycle, Kasha is whinging abouts and I need to sweat a bit ... later later ... have a good weekend and we'll see where we head to with all this in the coming weeks :))