When 2011 came into being, I'd had sort of crawled into the year not too sure what was ahead of me and how I was going to make this move to Dubai anything of a success for me let alone for anyone who mattered in my life.
Every step of the way is always stopping pondering weighing if the choices I make are for really the good of those I care about. But 2011 January came with me feeling sorta like in a limbo and no direction of what was to come. The feeling of loneliness in a strange land kept a stronghold grip on my neck. And to be honest, I have to look back and realise I was having a mild bout with depression. Thankfully though I am somewhat resilient in these deeps and valleys and after some rounds of self pity - which serves no purpose in rectifying the issues, I tried to crawl out of this wallowing and move along.
In February we had an office move. Being not really specifically assigned to any task per se, I decided to attach myself back to what I was familiar with - IT and thankfully the IT Manager here being another Malaysian understands the frustrations I felt/still feel at my state of limbo.
We started the move, I offered to coordinate, to help with inventory control, to label desk and network points and send update emails in my usual tongue-in-cheek manner. Some people liked it, some people bitched about it and generally well things moved a little. Apparently I suddenly created a visibility for myself in undertaking this with the IT team.
Then as the move settled in, and the hiccups and the whining that some primadons in the office got addressed it was like oh-oh what do I do now. Then came along a new little venture. The company was opening up and office in DWC at the new airport and the space we had needed to be set up. WOW MOMMA that was really like out in the boondocks with just sand for miles and every sandstorm meant triple cleaning to make the place look inhabitable.
But with the IT guys Raja and Vallie, we got down to making it happen. There was also Gen. Mahesh - whose unlimited resourcefulness in finding solutions for the interim and long term we made it happen. 4 brown people making things move and shake and from a sand caked warehouse and office space, we got desk and chairs and phone lines and cleaning services into place. This went on till May before the Ops team there decided to take over the coordination side of things that I was handling. Slowly I phased myself out coz I understand I'm not into politics and when it rears its ugly ass-kissing head, I make exit stage right pronto.
But in May, my dad had another bout with gangrene and this time a decision was made. In order to give the patient a quality of life - one not regulated by constant visits to the ortho-surgery for amputations, the advice was to amputate till below the right knee where blood flow was good and healing of the wound would be better. Dad agreed, but it meant he'd lost his mobility.
3 months he spent at a nursing home post surgery coz he needed constant care. My brother undertook the shuttling around. Mom was handling the kids in Seremban. When dad was coming home in August, I went home for a few days in conjunction with Eid break here in the Middle East.
At that time we started talking about the girls coming over to Dubai during their December vacation. It was should they travel UMR or should I come back and get them which would mean 2 return tickets *ouch ouch ouch* on my pockets - so ok they agreed to UMR i.e. travelling as Unaccompanied Minors on Emirates.
But fate as it would decided things were to be different.
In November we learnt mom had found a lump in her left breast, the mammogram and biopsy said cancer and surgery would be needed immediately - that was the first action required. I flew back to Malaysia for that, dad was again put into a nursing home for his care. The useless maid we've had for 7 years was going on a vacation - so we left her to carry on. I was there for the surgery, but left with the kids back to Dubai.
Now obviously with mom's health issue, something had to be done. So kids came here, and sat for assessment tests and got admitted into a school here and well it was all sorta rolling into a big snowball of activities. We went home together for a Christmas that was silent and quiet since dad was still in nursing care and mom was in recovery preping for her first of six chemo sessions which doctors say will cull the spread of the cancer any further. We pray all this goes well.
Thankfully my sister arrived end of December to be with mom for the first chemo session and so the plan of moving the kids had to go into full gear now. We managed to run around in December when I was there with the paper work. And left more with my sister and brother to complete.
We spent the last day of 2011 at home making mutton currypuffs that my grandma is famous for. I cooked some lunch and we took it up for dad's dinner at the home. After spending some hours with dad, we got home and had a little dinner at Gaban - a restaurant we used to frequent before with school buddies back in the 90s. Then home to welcome the new year in a quiet manner - it was not a festive year 2011. And I had packed and was ready to leave New Years Day back to Dubai.
I would have to say this has had to be one of the most trying of years. We had many along the way in the past decade that really tested us. I am blessed that my siblings have always stood by me through my hard times. I am blessed that I have beautiful smart kids who I shall soon have with me in Dubai. I am blessed that despite whatever happens, God always carries me through it better prepared for the next challenge.
Bring it on 2012 ... what doesn't kill you makes you stronger they say and I've not been killed so far so you know I am stronger :))
Happy Trails and Happy New Year!!!!