Why I Write ...

Purely as a form of expression to the emotions that run riot in my life at different junctures. This blog has seen several title revisions that also reflect the state of being and evolution I am constantly in. If one were to remain stagnant in hope of never changing their temporal present, one will awaken someday to much regret. Life is about living, evolving and adapting to the constant changes all around us.

My spot on the web is essentially a journey along with my monologue ramblings of my coherent mind accompanied by the incoherent thing called life. Read me if you like ... if you don't it is not the end of the world. I am at the very least a believer in humility lifts us further than pride.

Happy trails

8 August 2008

Looking Me Up??? Aug 08, 2008

Petaling Jaya, Wilayah Persekutuan arrived
from search.yahoo.com on "Incoherent Ramblings of Ashka Part 2: Despair ... Feb 13, 2008" by searching for anita george xybase.

Hello random blog crawler ... how's it going?

Ever since I added the feedjit link I've been interested to see how people arrive on my page ... and about 34 hours ago from when I write this, this entry was in my history.

WHOA! Someone searching me up?? And more importantly why? I mean I don't see any new message in my message box. And I didn't receive any email from anyone unexpected ... so this is rather unnerving.

Yes I do work in XYBASE - it's an IT company - anyone in the industry knows that. And yes I am Anita George aka .ani and a host of other names people tend to refer to me with. But to yahoo search me out - YIKES!

All it does point to is someone who obviously knows where I work ... Now was the sole intention to find my blog? (I have 3 mind you and one initial blog on Friendster). Hehehehhe it's not like I am some celebrity blogger with anything worthwhile to scour the net to find me.

Which brings to mind a couple of blogs I randomly decided I would read, which then took me due to their posts to another few more blogs and WHOA! I've come to realise this public display of thoughts is most definitely a double edged sword (I mean I knew this all along, but to see how entries are used for one's self gain ... aiyo!!)

A famous celeb male blogger and the so called love triangle gone bad. The blogs are all very very very emotional and to an extent disturbing. I mean I am guilty of laying my heart out in some of my entries, especially concerning my forever dragging divorce and the relationship post separation that didn't work out as I'd wanted it to ... but other than that and the fact that only of late I've had any traffic other than myself (ahahahhaha what to do?? I write, I read) I've used my spot in netspace to rant and rave what otherwise clutters my head so much. What I've written is about me, my feelings and my excitement and my disappointments and my hopes - it's like I said all about .ani

But the double edge to this is people are quick to make assumptions based on their 'sterile' reading of your writings. I don't think the 'passion' with which I've written my thoughts is accurately conveyed to the reader and hence it's not really fair to expect it to be so or for the reader to truly understand what I am on about.

Thus finding someone out there ACTUALLY looking for me per se is like huh??? Whatcha talking about Willis????? To be honest it kinda scared me a little. Having said that, I do realise the consequence of taking fingers to keyboard and writing about yourself on the net. It's open to interpretation and it's public space ... I guess what it boils down to is how people use the 'information' they have and for what purposes.

Again referring to the love triangle blogs, it was pretty disheartening and I can't even begin to explain why it disheartened me so much. But whilst I sip my Milo O in the office in place of lunch (with current economic situation, gone are the days of having lunch hahaha) I am wondering what my visitor found when he/she got here and if they know me, why hadn't they said hello - or perhaps its one of the 2 people who disappointed me wanting to know what was up with my unhappening life.

Sorry to disappoint you if you wanted saucy details ahahha - I am soooooooooo BORING (as is constantly reitirated by the Squirrel Dude's buddy) there's nothing glam or juicy going on. The only saucy detail I can share with you is my on-going affair with my old piece of junk car Charles and the fact that I think Charles is now gone either bi or gay seeing as Charles likes to see my mechanic Ah Foong every other week ... sheez!!!

It's Friday ... what's happening to the world we live in??? Malaysia is totally confused is all I can say ... Have a pleasant weekend.

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